I’m not sure if anyone still keeps up with this. I’ve been wanting to update this for awhile, but had a bit of technical issues and life changes. The big change is: I’m in London! Actually, I’m halfway through my trip now. Got here in May and will be here until August. I also got myself involved with a few projects, and so not able to update in full detail now.
All I can say is…wow! Talk about change! I’m going through the whole range of motions – excitement, discovery, sadness, feeling alone, realizations, perseverance, determination, fear, anxiety, courage, hope. Been spending a lot of time by myself, looking inward to clear out the weeds towards growth and renewal. It’s intense, but also refreshing.
Will update more soon, but for now, know that I’ve been thinking about all of you and sending lots of warm hugs and smiles your way.
I used to think love was burning desire, fueled by another
I used to think love needed to be pedestals with compromise
and pain and enmity, followed by intense reconcile
I used to think love was other
Maybe it still is, but now
Now love is more
Love is music
Love is art
Love is adventure
Love is freedom
Love is gratitude
Love is healing
Love is home
Love is You
Love is …..
Over the past few years, I’ve noticed a consistency of struggles and changes during the first quarter of the year, more particularly over lent. I’m not sure if it’s oppression or not, but I often tend to get spiritually, financially, purposefully challenged the beginning of each year. As Easter approaches, I reach an internal spring cleaning of sorts. My spirit feels renewed (as much as I let it) and I reminded of the hope and glory God’s love offers.
So in the spirit of change and faith, I thought of posting an old favorite song of renewal:
He’s more than the laughter or the stars in the heavens
As close a heartbeat or a song on her lips
Someday she’ll trust Him and learn how to see Him
Someday He’ll call her and she will come running
and fall in His arms and the tears will fall down and she’ll pray, “I want to fall in love with You”
And of course, my favorite Jesuit quote that has motivated me through many changes:
Nothing is more practical than finding God, than falling in Love in a quite absolute, final way. What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you do with your evenings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, whom you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. Fall in Love, stay in love, and it will decide everything. – Father Pedro Arrupe SJ
Both are fervent reminders to fall in love, stay in love, and let God. Much needed after all this internal questioning and settling I’ve been going through. Thank you, Love 🙂
Got lost in the woods then found my solace among the trees. I’ve been hiking a lot lately, and it has become my peaceful workout and motivation. Didn’t want to crop or edit the photo, as it captures the precise feeling of gathering my thoughts along the way.
Poignant, don’t you think?
We often tell ourselves, “I’ll be happy when….” or “I’ll feel better about myself when….”. Sure the motivation is great, but what about now? What about enjoying what life presents to you, right now? Whatever you give out in thought, word, feeling, and action is returned to you. Whether the return is negative, or positive, failure or success, is all up to what you give out. The trick is: keeping the right perspective. It’s easy to question our worth, how or why things happen to us, but don’t take your thoughts, time or life for granted: “because we are alive, everything is possible.”
I wrote this post back in January 2011, but look back on it every year as a refresher
Here comes another year, another season of hope and expectations, and another threshold of change. It’s kind of a ritual isn’t it? At the end of every year, we reminisce on the good, tuck away the bad and hope against hope that next year will be better.
Next year we’ll be thinner, healthier, richer, able to travel more, able to find (or keep) the love of our lives, able to progress in our careers, more accomplished…yes, that’s the hope the new year always brings. Some sort of assessment of who we’ve become and a fresh start to once again, become who we’d rather be. Goals, resolutions, deadlines…whatever it takes to bring out the new and improved version of ourselves.
It’s definitely a great feeling: part euphoric because of it’s hopeful newness, part nerve wracking because of the uncertainty, but an all encompassing reminder that life is giving us another chance. That even though we’ve aged, struggled and may have missed out on a few opportunities; time and life are giving us another chance to try again. Not to simply start over and repeat the process, but to do things differently, with a more fervent passion and perhaps a little more direction on becoming who we’re meant to be.
So goes 2 rather pertinent questions: What will you do differently in 2016? Who do you want to be at the end of it?
It’s been a year of grief, confusion, and fear; but it’s also been a year of healing, renewal, and gratitude. It’s often said that “no matter what, there’s always something to be thankful for.” Not always easy to digest, but it’s definitely manifested for me this year.
A great big hug and THANK YOU to those who helped me regain my smiles and laughter;
to those who never judged, but always listened, consoled and even cried with me;
to those who kept in touch despite the ocean, lousy Internet and time difference in between;
to those who went out of their way to sustain my sense of home and belonging;
and especially to those that never doubt and continually give me hope, love, and strength to chase my crazy dreams.
I can’t thank you enough. and I keep thanking God for you. Have a very blessed and wonderful thanksgiving!!! 😘
I’ve been wanting to go to the Cordilleras and the Rice Terraces for quite a while, and finally got the chance to go this past week. Dad and I went for an adventure driving up the mountain ranges, hiking the rice terraces, sleeping in backpacker hostels, meeting locals, and visiting some historical sites. My dad had a tough time with some of the hikes, but he was a trooper and still made it up to the peak.
On the way back, we had problems with car and it just stopped working mid highway. The gears wouldn’t shift! There was no way we could drive back home. So in the middle of the night, we waited 3 hours for a tow truck and rode with them to Manila. Talk about adventure!
The view of the mountains as we drove through Mt Halsema highway, at 7000ft it’s the highest highway elevation in the Philippines.
We woke up at 4am to hike up Mt Kiltepan in Sagada. It was breathtaking to watch the sky change colors and directly greet the sun and the clouds for a new day.
One of my favorite photos, the sun shining through the trees like blessings of hope and love being bestowed from above. This was close to the Sumaguing Caves in Sagada
The famous Banaue Rice Terraces from the viewpoint. Imagine those steps that were hand carved in the 9th or 10th century. We were surrounded by its natural beauty!
As an update to my previous post, after 2 months in the hospital with pnuemonia. My grandpa is now apparatus free and can eat again, breathe on his own again, and getting ready to go home! What a miracle! The doctors and others were telling us to expect the worst, but at 97 he beat the odds and recovered!
Thank you Lolo! Thank you God! I’m so happy I’m in tears. Now I just need to go to Manila to spend time with him.